Life is a journey.
Have you ever been on a long road trip, taken a nap while another person was driving, and you were totally disoriented when you woke up because the landscape around you had changed and you were now in unfamiliar territory?
When this happens in life what do you do? Suddenly, the future before you has changed. You’re not sure what to do. What had seemed a certainty is now gone, instead of a few possible choices, anything is a possibility. While choice is great, too many choices are overwhelming.
Having a game-plan doesn’t ensure success.
Personally, I’m the type who prefers to always have a game-plan, and usually with a few back-up plans just in case Plan A falls apart. Unfortunately, sometimes my plans turn into an epic fail. And even though I’ve said I’d rather take the risk to either succeed spectacularly or fail epically, its really no fun to feel like you’ve failed. Success is always preferred.
Right now my heart hurts, my brain is on overload, and my emotions are all over the map. How do I make sense of this? Where is God in all of this? Did I miss something? Where did I go wrong? Is my judgement really that off? How could I have possibly messed this up so badly? Can I really trust myself again? These are the thoughts that plague me in the quietness of the night hours. Nothing makes sense to me anymore. Even listening to my iTunes can be dangerous if the wrong song plays in the shuffle.
What’s a girl to do?
“Be still and know that I am God.” Still. Do I know how to be still? Not very well. In fact out culture pretty much shuns stillness. Between books, internet and social media, television, movies, smartphones, and tablet devices we have an multitude variety of things to keep our minds and brains so entertained that we forget how to be still and just listen. Sometimes we’re afraid of our own thoughts – but are those really what we need to be listening to? I’ve heard it said that to get to true stillness we need to:
Quiet our actions so we can hear our voice
Quiet our voice so we can hear our thoughts
Quiet our thoughts so we can hear our breathing
Quiet our breathing so we can hear our heartbeat
Quiet our heartbeat so we can hear our soul
Quiet our soul so we can hear the Voice of God (paraphrased)
The landscape has changed.
So, here in this new place, which seems so barren, I’m allowing myself to be still. To be okay with being in the ‘in-between’. And while I’m being still and quiet He will heal me and then He will whisper to me which way I’m supposed to go.
I’m okay with that.